tHe haMsTer haS faLlEn oFf thE wHeEl

Moved

2006-03-23T02:16:00.000-06:00

I've moved to www.recklesslydreaming.net

2005-10-26T21:05:00.000-05:00

Today was a very busy and long day (it is not over yet). It was also a very good day. I spent some time talking to Brian McLaren today. Over our lunch, I asked him a question about how dealing with opposition both personally and publicly. He talked about 3 things and afterwards he directed me to this prayer. It has been googled for you and is below (funny how google can bring both so much information and so much trouble).......

A Prayer for Enemies by Bishop Nikolai Velimirovich (a Serbian Orthodox bishop who opposed the Nazis and was eventually sent to the Dachau concentration camp)

Bless my enemies, O Lord. Even I bless them and do not curse them. Enemies have driven me into Your embrace more than friends have. Friends have bound me to earth, enemies have loosed me from earth and have demolished all my aspirations in the world.

Enemies have made me a stranger in worldly realms and an extraneous inhabitant of the world. Just as a hunted animal finds safer shelter than an unhunted animal does, so have I, persecuted by enemies, found the safest sanctuary, having ensconced myself beneath Your tabernacle, where neither friends nor enemies can slay my soul. Bless my enemies, O Lord. Even I bless them and do not curse them.

They, rather than I, have confessed my sins before the world. They have punished me, whenever I have hesitated to punish myself They have tormented me, whenever I have tried to flee torments. They have scolded me, whenever I have flattered myself They have spat upon me, whenever I have filled myself with arrogance.

Bless my enemies, O Lord. Even I bless them and do not curse them. Whenever I have made myself wise, they have called me foolish. Whenever I have made myself mighty, they have mocked me as though I were a dwarf. Whenever I have wanted to lead people, they have shoved me into the background. Whenever I have rushed to enrich myself, they have prevented me with an iron hand. Whenever I thought that I would sleep peacefully, they have wakened me from sleep. Whenever I have tried to build a home for a long and tranquil life, they have demolished it and driven me out. Truly, enemies have cut me loose from the world and have stretched out my hands to the hem of Your garment.

Bless my enemies, O Lord. Even I bless them and do not curse them. Bless them and multiply them; multiply them and make them even more bitterly against me: so that my fleeing to You may have no return; so that all hope in men may be scattered like cobwebs; so that absolute serenity may begin to reign in my soul; so that my heart may become the grave of my two evil twins: arrogance and anger; so that I might amass all my treasure in heaven; ah, so that I may for once be freed from self-deception, which has entangled me in the dreadful web of illusory life.

Enemies have taught me to know what hardly anyone knows, that a person has no enemies in the world except himself. One hates his enemies only when he fails to realize that they are not enemies, but cruel friends. It is truly difficult for me to say who has done me more good and who has done me more evil in the world: friends or enemies. Therefore bless, O Lord, both my friends and my enemies. A slave curses enemies, for he does not understand. But a son blesses them, for he understands. For a son knows that his enemies cannot touch his life. Therefore he freely steps among them and prays to God for them. Bless my enemies, O Lord. Even I bless them and do not curse them.

engrish 2

2005-10-21T19:57:00.001-05:00

engrish 2
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

My pal Sally went to Japan and brought me back some brilliant Engrish shirts - Behold the first one.

engrish 1

2005-10-21T19:57:00.000-05:00

engrish 1
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

My pal Sally went to Japan and brought me back some brilliant Engrish shirts - Behold the second one.

2005-10-02T15:30:00.000-05:00

a though to chew on from a book I am reading. More to come when the reading is finished.....

"The educated Bible reader has difficulties understanding those [biblical texts] that deal with women in the Pauline churches because they are texts without social contexts which have been used selectively. "

2005-09-30T01:15:00.000-05:00

I have traded tornadoes for fires (and earthquakes and mudslides).... Welcome to Southern California.

2005-09-29T21:38:00.000-05:00

Long time no update - life has been full of transitions and getting adjusted to life in Malibu.

One phrase snipets since the last update:

- fondue
- brush fires
- first real Malibu moment
- guacamole
- hurricanes
- women & ministry & churches of christ
- climbing
- new survivor season

2005-09-01T02:53:00.000-05:00

Woohoo - a new Making Fiends is out! Yea for Sept. 1!

like a missing piece to a puzzle

2005-08-29T01:41:00.000-05:00

It all begin with something deep in me knowing there was an email to be sent (Yes, for all of you Strengths people I have Self-Assurance - so you know the role of the deep inner voice). Couple that with preparing for a devo rooted in Colossians 1. Then mix in reflection of what my call to ministry has looked like and where it has taken me.

I addressed the Pepperdine student body tonight for the first time at the All Campus Candle Light Devo it was if a piece of my ministry that had been forced to be dormant for so long was allowed to be used for the first time. A piece that I have always known was there, a piece who I questioned if I'd get to ever use, a piece that fit in ways I couldn't have imagined.

There are many other pieces to my ministry that have gotten much use - relationships with students, the occasional speaking at weekly campus ministry gatherings, writing and leading small group/bible studies, planning retreats, planning worship, integrating arts into worship or study.

It's a feeling similar to what Jen Hale blogged about. Unless you've experienced a piece of it, it is hard to explain. And it is not something rooted out of speaking in front of a large group, I've done that before.

It is about something feeling very right. It is about a piece you've always known existed, but have never been allowed to bring out. A piece that you've questioned if it is really true. A piece that you've wondered why it is yours. A piece that never seemed to have a place - or maybe seemed to be to a different puzzle altogether.

Tonight the piece was allowed to be brought out into public. Tonight it was able to be shown. Tonight it was able to be used to speak truth - to speak to specific students. A piece that I was able to bring by getting out the way and being used. A piece where I found myself (as the other Jen puts it) - "something (looking back, most certainly it was the Holy Spirit) absolutely overtook me and the words of God just poured out of me."

A feeling of rightness. Not of perfection. But of a piece at last being able to find its place alongside the others. A piece that with the others is part of a larger life of ministry.

so who do you work with?

2005-08-29T01:25:00.000-05:00

P1010106
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

This is our retreat, where you could 'camp.'

Christopher, Tara, Stuart, Michele, Lynnea, Chuck, Jen, Adam

2005-08-29T01:21:00.000-05:00

DSCN0453
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

Training is over. This is what happens after too much training and then taking us back up to the President's house.

2005-08-24T00:40:00.000-05:00

My consecutive month and then some of training is officially over. The evaluations are finished - and the most exciting part is that students are moving in . Today was the official freshman move-in day. I love this part of the school year. I love watching the new students, the parents, and the student staff all interact. It is interesting to think how much things change in this one moment - as the students officially move into a new phase of their lives. For our students, they now have a week filled with activities and meetings before classes start next week.

In other news, I have been asked to speak at the campus candlelight devo this upcoming Sunday - this is the project that has been in the back of my mind since I was asked to do it. It is one of the final activities for the 800 or so new freshmen in their orientation process. My message may make it here with it is more processed and has grown some more legs to stand on.

Jen gets her MDiv? I have officially started looking at what it will take to add one more sheet of paper to my wall. Right now I am talking to Fuller and Pepperdine to see what it would look like time and financial wise. Maybe I'll just print one out online. But Trav, Greg - I think I am soon to be in the add on another Masters club. Do we have buttons? A secret handshake? I am not a boy, can I still join?

I had some free CDS to redeem - here is the ecclectic mix: Janis Joplin (18 essential songs), Michael Buble, DMB (Stand Up), Maroon 5 (Songs About Jane), Green Day (Dookie & Nimrod), John Mayer (Heavier Things).

- night

moon at sunset

2005-08-19T01:37:00.000-05:00

IMG_3510.JPG
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

The view at sunset at said pool party.

2005 SLAs.JPG

2005-08-19T01:36:00.000-05:00

2005 SLAs.JPG
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

These are my 2005-2006 SLAs at our pool party at the president's house.

is it still today?

2005-08-18T02:38:00.000-05:00

We are approaching the end of training. I met my student leaders at 8 this morning and got home just a bit ago (after midnight) and will meet them again tomorrow at 8. Hopefully I will get to shower and get to bed in the next hour, depending on how long it takes it get my stuff done.

I had a real post the other day, but blogger ate it. Maybe I will write one this weekend. We'll see.

...back to the stuff and then sleep sleep sleep.

2005-08-18T02:29:00.000-05:00

create your own personalized map of the USA

2005-08-10T04:18:00.000-05:00

In 2003, I was not far from where some of the Columbia debris landed. This morning, I was aroused from my sleep by the boom of the re-entry of Discovery.

goodnight.

I got stung by a bee on the lip

2005-08-08T00:39:00.000-05:00

I have worked with kids for many many years. As a result, I have been exposed to Veggie Tales and Silly Songs with Larry. I have heard the "Love My Lips" song for years. This weekend I was bit by a bee right on the lip (and on both ears). Here is the segment of that song for your enjoyment. ...

Ten days after I turned 8,
Got my lips stuck in a gate
My friends all laughed

And I just stood there until the fire department came
and broke the lock with a crowbar and I had to spend
the next six weeks in lip rehab with this kid named Oscar
who got stung by a bee right on the lip and we couldn't
even talk to each other until the fifth week because both
our lips were so swollen and when he did start speaking
he just spoke polish and I only knew like three words in polish

except now I know four because Oscar taught me the
word for lip, Usta

sushi

2005-07-24T21:15:00.000-05:00

sushi
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

Jen's first shot at sushi

the view

2005-07-24T18:20:00.000-05:00

the view
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

I finally took some pictures - Click on this one to browse the rest of them.

I am not dead.....and I am not in Kansas anymore.

2005-07-23T01:55:00.000-05:00

I am wrapping up my first week here at Pepperdine. For those of you keeping score back home here are things I have already been asked and their answers.

1. Yes, I have now officially been to the ocean for the first time. (Tuesday)
2. Yes, I have seen someone famous - right outside my apartment - a very pregnant Britney Spears, which I had to walk past to go check my mail. (Monday)
3. My Mazda3 is much more fun in traffic than the truck.
4. I had sushi for the first time. (Thursday)
5. Day 2 of work was the start of a staff retreat - rough huh?

Update with real details to come - now I am off to watch 30 Days....

-j

zoom zoom

2005-07-07T00:14:00.000-05:00

I did it. The truck has a new home. I have a new Mazda3s.
Zoom Zoom.

2005-07-05T00:51:00.000-05:00

the drive started just after 7am this morning. It is now more than 930 miles and lots of hours later... I am in Texas (David - "The Friendly State") and going to sleep sleep sleep.

2005-07-03T02:04:00.000-05:00

The move is looming. I will be driving all day on the 4th to get back to Texas. Just over a week later the trek to California begins. If I could fit everything I owned into a large backpack I would just board a plane. drat.

2005-06-29T02:36:00.000-05:00

Here is a little more information on what I will be doing at Pepperdine. I will be the Coordinator for the Spiritual Life Advisor Program. The SLAs live on campus and "serve as the chaplain or 'spiritual shepherd' to students by fostering an atmosphere that encourages spiritual growth through encouragement, support, and accountability." The SLCs have all served as SLAs in the past and serve in a mentoring role to the current SLAs. Another part of my job will be to work with student ministries on campus. I worked with a similar part of Campus Life when I was at Grad School at ACU. Here is where I'll live.

For my peeps in Texas, I'll be heading that way in just over a week. I will be in Lubbock most of the time - but there will be a stop in Abilene before the long drive west.

The update....

2005-06-27T00:11:00.000-05:00

Times they are a changing. It is going to be an extremely hectic next few weeks around here. (Around here is currently Manhattan, KS but will soon trek it down to Texas - mainly Lubbock but with stops in Arlington/Duncanville/Abilene adn then the long trek to Malibu, CA.)

I officially accepted a position at Pepperdine earlier this month and will begin making my trek west a week from Monday. In the mean time I am finishing up details here in Manhattan, packing offices and home, getting ready to sell my truck and purchase something smaller (and with better gas mileage), and wrap up all of the other loose ends. Anyone want to come and pack for me? It is my leasst favorite part of moving.

It is time for a shower to remove the sand that attached itself to my body during sand volleyball. More post to come when I want to procrastionate packing/cleaning out.

the lovely taco hut sign

2005-06-20T13:32:00.000-05:00

tacohut1
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

hummmm - nothing says mexican food like the taco hut (halfway between taco bell and pizza hut). No thank you when it looks like grease drips from the building.

the actual taco hut

2005-06-20T13:31:00.000-05:00

tacohut2
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

the taco hut man

2005-06-20T13:30:00.000-05:00

tacohutman
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

Taco Hut

2005-06-15T22:41:00.000-05:00

Chuck - I will post a picture just for you. I tried to see if they have a website - tacohut . com redirects to a porn site warning page. Humm that is scary. But I will get you a picture of the grease pit located between Pizza Hut and Taco Bell.

Airports are interesting places.

2005-06-15T21:30:00.000-05:00

Today the woman next to me on my flight from Phoenix to Kansas City tried to carry on a large box of eggs. Yes eggs. No extra packaging (a partial brown box held them. They did not fit overhead. They did not fit under the seat. So she scooted them back and just put her legs over them. This did not go over for long. The flight attendants had seen the box come on. They had seen it try unsuccessfully to go above. They knew it would not fit below. They were looking for the box. The woman did not speak much English. They told her to hand over the box - it would have to be checked. But they are eggs, she replied. (At this point I am thinking - please do not put the box of eggs with the rest of our luggage; I do not want to imagine what would happen as they came a rolling down the baggage claim track...yuck yuck yuck). They took the eggs. She was not happy. It appears they found somewhere in the cabin to keep them. No eggs on the luggage.

the end.

heading to the west coast...

2005-06-12T21:17:00.000-05:00

Tonight I am packing for a quick trip to Malibu and back for a final interview. Right now its checking email and charging the iPod time.
- Jen

2005-06-08T16:25:00.000-05:00

Packing is not as much fun as it might appear. I thought for sure that by now we would have been able to make it a simpler process. I am leaving the "little apple" sometime in the next week - for one of two unnamed cities for one of two unnamed jobs. Either way there is packing involved. It has begun as my office is finding its way into boxes (we are about to do a large bit of construction at the campus center so I want to get my stuff out of the way as soon as possible). My room at home is also collecting boxes. Shouldn't we have a teleporter-type-something by now? Isn't that what cartoons told us all those Saturday mornings?

ahh well... back to boxes and papers.

2005-06-03T01:09:00.000-05:00

Things that I wonder how they made it on the "news" page:

1. Michael Jackson
2. Runaway Bride
3. Rare nickel sells for $4 million

Really isnt there something more important going on in the world to make the top headlines? Are we so America-centric that we devote large amounts of time week after week after week to one and two?

on being right.....

2005-05-31T17:16:00.000-05:00

The Captive Mind - Czeslaw Milosz (the epigraph)

When someone is is 55 oercent right, that's very good and there's no wrangling. And if someone is 60 percent right, it's wonderful, it's a great luck, and let him thank God. But what's to be said about 75 percent right? Wise people say that is suspicious. Well, and what about 100 percent right? Whoever says he is 100 percent right is a fanatic, a thug, and the worst kind of rascal."

reflections from the park

2005-05-30T17:28:00.000-05:00

(from my journal yesterday)

I sat at the park yesterday finishing a book (Speaking My Mind see left), started a new one ( Searching for God Knows What ) and people watching. I was sitting near a "lake." Really more like a pond. There was a young family near me - 2 young girls with parents in tow. Kids enjoy "fishing" like no one else I know. It is in quotes because I am sure it doesn't meet the standards of many anglers. How many times is it physically possible to reel in a line in a minute? They hardly had lines in the water before the youngest had a bite (she was a young two-ish). What a fun scene. There was also a fish in the water directly in front of me. I was sure of this because it kept coming and nipping the surface. After awhile, I thought "I wonder if fish eat cheese." I am sure this was on your mind also. Yes, in fact they do. It was gone just shortly after it hit the water. Then of course my brain started thinking. Just down the way they were offering food also - it was just on the end of a pointy hook. My cheese had no conditions. In fact I did not see the fish or evidence of it again. So being a minister I headed down the path of pratical application. (It did not help that I had just finished Tony Campolo's book). How often do we (Christians) offer things to the world with conditions or hooks in them. How often when we reach out as christian ministries or churches, do we put conditions on what it takes for assistance (come to church being a big one)? Have we created an ugly pairing? By doing this have we distorted the image of Jesus. I firmly believe that in a world such as ours - ministry to the immediate needs of individuals opens doors to verbally sharing the gospel (I also believe that it is shared in the actions) - but it being a condition scares the heck out of me.

the end.

2005-05-28T20:40:00.000-05:00

For one of my friends - I read these words and heard this saong today and thought of you. We need to spend some time together this week. I know you'll see this.

I am hurt but I am not slain,
I'll lay me down and bleed awhile,
And then I'll rise and fight again.

Poet Sir Andrew Barton

David CrowderAll I Can Say -

Lord I'm tired
So tired from walking
And Lord I'm so alone
And Lord the dark
Is creeping in
Creeping up
To swallow me
I think I'll stop
Rest here a while

And didn't You see me cry'n?
And didn't You hear me call Your name?
Wasn't it You I gave my heart to?
I wish You'd remember
Where you sat it down

Chorus:
And this is all that I can say right now
And this is all that I can give

Bridge:
I didn't notice You were standing here
I didn't know that
That was You holding me
I didn't notice You were cry'n too
I didn't know that
That was You washing my feet

2005-05-25T22:44:00.001-05:00

Some days its a Party Shuffle mood, others pick that playlist or album - but tonight it is a one track repeat night.

New from Charlie Hall - available on the Passion 05 - How Great is Our God CD .

Verse 1
I once was fatherless,
a stranger with no hope;
Your kindness wakened me,
Awakened me, from my sleep

Verse 2
Your love it beckons deeply,
a call to come and die.
By grace now I will come
And take this life, take your life.

Pre-chorus
Sin has lost it's power,
death has lost it's sting.
From the grave you've risen
VICTORIOUSLY!

Chorus
Into marvelous light I'm running,
Out of darkness, out of shame.
By the cross you are the truth,
You are the life, you are the way

Verse 3
My dead heart now is beating,
My deepest stains now clean.
Your breath fills up my lungs.
Now I'm free. now I'm free!

Bridge
Lift my hands and spin around,
See the light that i have found.
Oh the marvelous light
Marvelous light

Lift my hands and spin
See the light within...

back in kansas

2005-05-24T09:38:00.000-05:00

Nearly 2000 miles later I am back in Kansas.

I have had my fill of Mexican food from the following establishments (some more than once) Rosa's, Abuleos, and Taco Bueno.

I had Texas BBQ from Joe Allen's .

I audited Theology of Church Music and spent time with friends, grad students, and co-workers at ACU. I even got to spend time with my colonial kids on Wednesday.

2005-05-17T22:17:00.000-05:00

oregon trail for my mac :)

crack of dawn

2005-05-14T06:54:00.000-05:00

yes you are reading that time stamp correctly.. yes i am actually in the central time zone at the moment.

1. dad i nearly called to tell you my departure time ealier in this hour. i am sure you were awake. but alas i did not. the magic hour is 9.

2. i have not been to sleep yet. i was at a youth lock-in. good kids. some neat discussions about what it means to be a community that has very different personalities and the hard parts of being a leaders. teaching moments huh?

3. currently charging for the drive: the ipods, the laptop, the cell phone

4.did you know there is a whole different world of bagels that are available at 6:20? i never knew. welcome to my world dutch apple bagel and cobblestone muffin. you made many more pastery friends surrounding you at this hour too.

4b. chai tea latte my friend, i have missed you.

5. we dance dance revolutioned on the big screen today.

6. need to pack

7. need to finish laundry.

8. next post from Texas. (On my birthday I was given perhaps the ugliest Texas shirt EVER! But I will wear it - fear not!)

9. need to shower.

10.goodbye

the short list

2005-05-12T00:26:00.000-05:00

1. my shoes came on tuesday. shoes = 3 No not pairs. 3 shoes. Two lefts and a right. One and a half pairs. It was an interesting suprise when I opened the box. A replacement should be here Friday.

2. new blog layout. we will see how long it lasts.

3. the semester officially ends here Friday.

4. Friday I am a sponsor at a youth lock-in.

5. Saturday I drive to Texas. ( I know 4 + 5 = scary)

6. I will be in Texas a week. It looks like Lubbock and Abilene.

7. Phone interview went well. I see if I made it to the next round (pool of 5) a week-ish from tomorrow.

8. widgets are fun.

2005-05-08T00:47:00.000-05:00

this female postmodern campus minister God follower is tired and not gonna blog tonight. maybe tomorrow. there are some swell things to say. but not tonight.

here are some teasers:

1. anti-road trip
2. free ipod
3. keen sneakers
4. mothers day
5. pepperdine interview
6. pocket guide to the apocalypse

What I want for my birthday....

2005-05-04T21:22:00.000-05:00

I turn 26 on a week from tomorrow - on the 12th. I hae heard that question a bunch. If I was 6 I would have a list for you (and it would change each day or maybe hour). If I thought about I am sure I could come up with some things (I will be moving soon - maybe near the coast), but the overwhelmingly stark reality is that I have more than I need and more than I could want (even though sometimes I buy into another lie). I live in a nation that has more than it needs and spends amazingly too much on things it will never need or use.

So here is what I want.

1. Speak out about the situation in Darfur - write a letter or use this one from Sojourners

If you are still reading - and want to get me something here are places that will take your money (this list may grow):

2. I want a chick or part of a cow for a family.

3. I want to donations to head toward One - to fight against AIDS and extreme poverty.

4. I want help prevent the genocide from continuing in Darfur.

may others live to have another birthday.

2005-05-04T02:22:00.000-05:00

current world population 6,439,410,521

Number who have ever been born 106,456,367,669 (this is a mid 2002 number)

even more numbers to crunch from peopleandplanet.net (numbers in 2002)

World Population in mid-2002 6,215,000,000
Percent of those ever born who are living in 2002 5.8

i am reminded how small i am

Thoughts on baptism

2005-05-02T01:21:00.000-05:00

But first - it appears that my three phone calls to apple support (initial call, call to let them know they sent the wrong half of the part, call to check on where the new part was) has officially ended by power cord ordeal. AppleCare did replace my product and has amazing shipping times (talked to them late in the day and had the part before noon the next day) - but there were some communication problems. The apple care (just over $200 with the educational discount) covers my laptop for 3 years - and in this case my power adapter (not power cord that is the wrong half) was beginning to fray after more than 18 months (at the bendy part where it plugs into the laptop). Not bad since it went through a good portion of graduate school with me and endured heavy use. I will be checking tomorrow to see if they have closed the incident on their end (received the broken part from me). Thank you Brent from AppleCare (he is from Canada) even though you didn't solve the problem completely (but you thought you did - but I do appreciate the way you handled the call) and Sheldon (who was not near as happy or customer service-y but did get everything straightened out).

I have had a lot of my students ask me or have a discussion with me about baptism. All ends of the spectrum - all kinds of questions - all different ways they view it.

I heard language today about its relationship to forgiveness of sin/moment of salvation (No, I am not addressing this here - but it is a very common question.)

But tonight I this thought/question has been bouncing around. Is sin the real issue? In many churches sin is the focus point. A key point in baptism. Its what you are not suppose to do. It is what you are dead to, but still struggle with. What does sin as a primary focus form us? Isn't the bigger issue not the sin itself, but since we are both born in sin and sin is in us then we are not in Christ and He is not in us? Isn't Christ the point? Isn't it us being in Christ and Christ in us? Isn't the core that Jesus lives today in us - isn't that the Mystery of the Gospel (sorry I've be in Colossians quite a bit lately)? Wasn't that the promise that it was better than being physically present when Jesus was born, lived, died, resurrected - that it was something better. The shift from God being with us to God being in us? Not some diluted flimsy version of Jesus in us, but the fullness of God in us? What if the focus of baptism looked at that amazing change of what we are in and what is in us?

I think I can get my head around forgiveness of sin, but as my students here can tell you - the fullness of Christ in you makes my head want to explode. Yet, that is not the language I hear. I hear sin being the point (I don't want to say that we should ignore sin, but is it the point? Is this the way that it should be treated?) - not relationship language, not transformation language. Is the real problem of humanity sin? Or rather a lack of being in Christ. A lack of relationship with the divine. A lack of responding to grace in faith? Is sin the point or a manifesting symptom?

I am old and getting older. I am going to sleep.

2005-04-25T02:17:00.000-05:00

busy week

but tomorrow our leaders bible study is finish our art project (which is a response to our silence devo)

more job applications are going out this week

a packed day in history

2005-04-19T11:55:00.000-05:00

As I sit and watch as the new Pope is announced and appears for the first time, I am reminded of many other events that have also taken place on this day.

Two events I that remember, and that are directly tied together - The Oklahoma City Bombing (Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building) ten years ago and the burning Branch Davidian compound twelve years ago.

Other moments in history on April 19th:
- The beginning of the American Revolution (1775)
- Ride of Paul Revere
- First blood shed in the America Civil War (1861)

why is blogger being silly

2005-04-18T18:13:00.001-05:00

and why can't i delete this post

2005-04-18T18:13:00.000-05:00

My brain is mush - and its getting mushier. Actually, is got about nine gillion things running around in it. It should land sometime in the next month - or maybe never.

Thigns that have contributed to this include - watching The Woodsman (several of the movies which only aired in "select cities" are now out on DVD), and reading the following (it was a full reading weekend - and some are not quite done) - from Brian McLaren - The Last Word, and the Word After That and A Generous Orthodoxy , from Leonard Sweet - Out of the Question, Into the Mystery , from C.S. Lewis The Great Divorce, and from Dallas Willard (he only got a chapter - for a Bible Study I am in) The Spirit of the Disciplines. Waiting in the wings are Tony Campolo's book - Speaking My Mindand Hotel Rwanda

Hopefully in the future I will process some of it here in more detail. Not today.

The Silence Devo was last Wednesday (I am really not sure what to think about this upcoming one - we will wait and see.) It ended up being silence in that there was nothing spoken. All of the normal elements of our midweek gathering were there - prayers, thoughts/message, songs, etc. But it was silence for over an hour. A gathering of college students silent. Next time, we will change some things, and take the journey farther into silence.

My is old. And softball reminds me of that. Each Friday our women spend time at the local park - at the batting cages (and playing catch) together. (Yes Greg, when I am working I get to go to the batting cages. I don't have to sneak off to go.) It is a good time for them to spend together and get excercise at the same time.

Greg - look at you making such a generous offer.

acu - bb - sunset

2005-04-12T02:34:00.000-05:00

acu - bb - sunset
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

Here is a picture of where I spent 2 years of my life - taken this summer (during ACU Leadership Kadesh Life Camps). A lovely picture of ACU's Bible Building (which now has somone else's name in front of it) - home of the Graduate School of Theology - and where several of my friends are still hanging out.
That fine camera by the way is the digital rebel. look at the colors as they come through the window. ahhh west texas sunsets.

good friday

2005-04-12T02:33:00.000-05:00

good friday
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

Kat,

Here is another painting I did. Its from Good Friday as I reflected on the end of Lent and approaching Easter. I have a few more uploaded to flicr that I may post over here later.

and yup my IRS stuff is e-filed. woohoo

for those who wander here via google

2005-04-11T22:42:00.000-05:00

650008
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

I apologize for a lack of pictures of hamsters and wheels. Today, I offer you this - a hamster in a jar. It is the best I can do. It may not save the world (in fact it will not) or bring about peace or solve the problems of world hunger or AIDS or poverty or win any awards, but it is indeed a picture of a hamster in a jar.

enjoy

2005-04-08T17:58:00.000-05:00

This last week back from the retreat a single question/idea has been bouncing in our campus ministry in various forms and wordings - but it comes back to one core thought - as Leonard Sweet states "How did we get the point but miss the person?" In our old people bible study (read graduates and young professionals) the question came from discussion in Dallas Willard's Spirit of the Disciplines how/when/why did we begin to focus on the things (in this case good spiritual disciplines), on how to be like Jesus in a certain situation/moment/etc rather than being transformed into Christ likeness so that those moments occur naturally?

When did Christianity become adopting the right belief system rather than the call to folllow, the call to leave all, to die, and to be transformed? When did it get reduced to a 2x2 tract that unfolds or fits neatly in your pocket?

Where did relationship go? Is it because it seems harder? Less concrete? Less modern? Is it because its something you can't "do" but rather who you are? Is it because its not a categorizeable momentary decision, but a life transformation? A transplant of heart and soul? Is it because as a society we like neat boxes and rules and certainty – and by its very nature relationships are dynamic and risky and unpredictable? Much less entering into relationship with the Almighty Creator God of the World whose primary concern is his glory and not my personal health and wants.

How did we move away from departmentalization to holistic relationship? Then it would also require greater relationships within the body of Christ itself. Maybe these are naïve words from a college minister – who with her own school, grad school, and work has found her in many churches since 1997- who knows what it is like to be able to be a member of a church that didnt require relationship. But what would a true understanding of the relationship that we are called to, strike that invited into with YHWH, look like among our church body and the smaller ministries within that body? How would it form our classes, interactions, speech, and worship? Fully realizing that simply changing the way we do things would not change this into relationship? What would happen if our hearts could get themselves around Colossians 1:15-20 and then the massive statement in 1:27 – the mystery of the gospel – Christ in you, the hope of glory?

Just thoughts that ran through this week and today as I spent time in the batting cages.

Look what the mailman brought

2005-04-07T15:16:00.000-05:00

0787975923.01._SCLZZZZZZZ_
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

:) and also in the box its friends: A Generous Orthodoxy (McLaren), God's Politics (Wallis), and Out of the Question ... into the Mystery (Sweet). I will be busy reading for awhile!

coolest thing ever

2005-04-05T19:14:00.000-05:00

satellite
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

Ok well maybe not ever. But check out http://maps.google.com and click on satellite. This fine shot is of the campus center where I am now working. Actually the dot is directly across the street. Those funny white buildings near the dot are the campus green houses which I am looking at right now from my window

2005-04-01T15:54:00.000-06:00

Getting ready to leave for the retreat - my body is revolting and ready to puke. So I thought I'd leave you with something more positive.

Here is part of morning TAWG (time alone with God) for Sunday for the retreat out of Colossians 1. The journal breaks down the verses into the statements about Christ and has the students pause and unpack each one. To reflect on the magnitude of what they are saying.

The visible image of the invisible God (15)

The first born of all creation (15)

For in him all things in heaven & on earth were created, things visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or powers(16)

All things have been created through him and for him (16)

He himself is before all things (17)

In him all things hold together (17)

He is the head of the body, the church (18)

The first born from the death (18)

For in him all the fullness of God was pleased to dwell (19)

Through him God was please to reconcile to himself all things, whether on earth on in heaven, by making peace through the blood of the cross. (20)

Party Shuffle

2005-03-28T18:31:00.000-06:00

Play iTunes play! You've had 40 days of downtime.

Week of craziness begins:

1. Retreat this weekend. So many last minute details. However, the small group sessions are written along with the directed time alone with God questions, worship leaders are choosen and they have their foci, shirts are ordered. But there is always something else.

2. Exciting email of the day! The job position I have been waiting to apply for was officially posted online today. More details to follow later.

3. The final devos on the Psalms need final touches. phew. They just keep coming.

4. The super secret silence devo now has a date - April 13th. I think we are going to invite the Christian Church University ministry to join us. It is beginning to take real form and is exciting.

5. The small group devos for next semester are looming. As is the flannel board that is hanging on my wall.

6. I will post some of my spiritual reflection art, since some of you have asked, at some point in the near future.

7. There are dove chocolate eggs on my desk. :)

iGospel

2005-03-22T00:28:00.000-06:00

iGospel
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

Potential Long Post Warning.....

We live in a very me-o-centric word, from advertising to computers. [I am writing this on my iBook, the software includes iCal, iTunes (which is out of commission until Easter!), iMovie, iDVD, iLife, one of my students has my iPod - see a trend?] Its all about me. An approach that works well for a company to convey to its customers.
However, it becomes scary when that me-focused, consumer mentality finds its want into our ministries and churches.
Several of the statements I have heard before (both growing up and as a "grown-up") revolve around a central idea - its about me. God loved me soooo much. If I was the only person - Jesus would have still come. [Insert note: Jen believes that God loves us and cares for us and has done amazing things for us.] But to steal from John Piper and Louie Giglio, we've hijacked the Gospel and made ourselves the central characters, rather than finding ourselves as minor roles in the story of God. (using the general "we" to cover the comments that I hear and the way I hear people talk about the Bible, and pray).
What if we've bought into a too small picture of the glory of God?

I don't think it was an intentional stealing of the story, but I sense it around me. The way we talk about church, God, politics, the world around us. The way we live our daily lives. What would it look like if we really got it into our heads that everything, rather than being about us, was about the glory of God? That our lives aren't about ourselves, but the glory of God? Our jobs? Finances? etc?

How does that change sermons? and devos? and times of worship? and prayer?

Words from Steven Curtis Chapman's Much of You

How could I stand here

And watch the sun rise

Follow the mountains

Where they touch the sky

Ponder the vastness

And the depths of the sea

And think for a moment

The point of it all was to make much of me

Cause I'm just a whisper

And You are the thunder and

I want to make much of You, Jesus

I want to make much of Your love

I want to live today to give You the praise

That You alone are so worthy of

I want to make much of Your mercy

I want to make much of Your cross

I give You my life

Take it and let it be used

To make much of You

And how can I kneel here

And think of the cross

The thorns and the whip and the nails and the spear

The infinite cost

To purchase my pardon

And bear all my shame

To think I have anything worth boasting in except for Your name

Cause I am a sinner

And You are the Savior

I want to make much of You, Jesus

I want to make much of Your love

I want to live today to give You the praise

That You alone are so worthy of

I want to make much of Your mercy

I want to make much of Your cross

I give You my life

Take it and let it be used

To make much of You

This is Your love, oh God

Not to make much of me

But to send Your own son

So that we could make much of You

For all eternity

I want to make much of You Jesus

I want to make much of Your love

I want to live today to give You the praise

That You alone are so worthy of

I want to make much of Your mercy

I want to make much of Your cross

I give You my life

Take it and let it be used

To make much of You

I want to make much of You

Much of You Jesus

In case you missed it the first time, here are the words from Louie G. again

Here's the story. God's done it all for his glory. He does everything he does for his glory. If you don't like that I'm sorry. If you were God, you would make yourself the center too, because you would have no choice but to do that. Because you are great. And god ahs made himself the center of every thought he has ever had, every action he has ever taken, every outcome he has ever hoped for. and he has made himself the centerpiece of history. But amazingly this God, who had everything, who was self-sustained, self existing. This God created a perfect world, He created a paradise for you and me. He said Hey I'm God, I'm the Lord, that's my name and I know thats my name. And your name is Adam and you r name is Eve. don't go around thinking that your name is god and your name is goddess. Your name is Adam, and your name is Eve, and my name is God. Are we all clear on that? Cool. I made all of this, and you guys weren't here yet. I know you guys would have loved to have been here to give me some feedback, and some help, and some advice, and some thoughts about it. But I made all this before you got here. Welcome to my story. Welcome to the planet earth. The end of the 6th day, creation’s done, everything’s made. Now he makes Adam and now he makes Eve. And he says, “Hey I just wanted you guys to be in the story. It’s my story. It’s my world. It’s my planet. It’s my universe. It’s all for me. From me through me to me, through me be the glory for ever and ever amen. And I just want to invite you in. “

Sarah - this is for you

2005-03-19T23:24:00.000-06:00

schedule-mt
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

2005-03-19T23:18:00.000-06:00

459
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

Phew - I've got you JB

For you Amanda

2005-03-16T21:02:00.000-06:00

SL 001
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

Really I just wanted you to see this Link

But then I thought wait I'll give her a post instead of just emailing it to her. (I would have sent it through msn or aim but you are now old and go to bed early!) Then I found this picture (actually I refrained from putting up one of you from the "garage" house ) and thought you might get some grins out of it.

gas2

2005-03-15T01:14:00.000-06:00

gas2
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

In case you need the un-doctored close-up photo

Cue REM appropiate song: (Greg?)

That's great, it starts with an earthquake, birds and snakes, an aeroplane -
Lenny Bruce is not afraid. Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn -world serves its own needs, don't misserve your own needs. Feed it up a knock, speed, grunt no, strength no. Ladder structure clatter with fear of height, down height. Wire in a fire, represent the seven games in a government for hire and a combat site. Left her, wasn't coming in a hurry with the furies breathing down your neck. Team by team reporters baffled, trump, tethered crop. Look at that low plane! Fine then. Uh oh, overflow, population, common group, but it'll do. Save yourself, serve yourself. World serves its own needs, listen to your heart bleed. Tell me with the rapture and the reverent in the right - right. You vitriolic, patriotic, slam, fight, bright light, feeling pretty psyched.

It's the end of the world as we know it. It's the end of the world as we know it.
It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine.

Six o'clock - TV hour. Don't get caught in foreign tower. Slash and burn, return, listen to yourself churn. Lock him in uniform and book burning, blood letting. Every motive escalate. Automotive incinerate. Light a candle, light a motive. Step down, step down. Watch a heel crush, crush. Uh oh, this means no fear - cavalier. Renegade and steer clear! A tournament, a tournament, a tournament of lies. Offer me solutions, offer me alternatives and I decline.

It's the end of the world as we know it.
It's the end of the world as we know it.
It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine.

The other night I tripped a nice continental drift divide. Mount St. Edelite. Leonard Bernstein. Leonid Breshnev, Lenny Bruce and Lester Bangs. Birthday party, cheesecake, jelly bean, boom! You symbiotic, patriotic, slam, but neck, right? Right.

It's the end of the world as we know it.
It's the end of the world as we know it.
It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine...fine...

(It's time I had some time alone)

Are you kidding me?

2005-03-15T01:12:00.000-06:00

gas1
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

This was the sign at the gas station tonight. Check out the medium grade. This is Kansas - so I expect it to be high, but not this high. Stinkin crazy.

2005-03-15T00:25:00.000-06:00

Thoughts from Louie G. from 722. This was taken from the end of "History Part 1"

Here's the story. God's done it all for his glory. He does everything he does for his glory. If you don't like that I'm sorry. If you were God, you would make yourself the center too, because you would have no choice but to do that. Because you are great. And god ahs made himself the center of every thought he has ever had, every action he has ever taken, every outcome he has ever hoped for. and he has made himself the centerpiece of history. But amazingly this God, who had everything, who was self-sustained, self existing. This God created a perfect world, He created a paradise for you and me. He said Hey I'm God, I'm the Lord, that's my name and I know thats my name. And your name is Adam and you r name is Eve. don't go around thinking that your name is god and your name is goddess. Your name is Adam, and your name is Eve, and my name is God. Are we all clear on that? Cool. I made all of this, and you guys weren't here yet. I know you guys would have loved to have been here to give me some feedback, and some help, and some advice, and some thoughts about it. But I made all this before you got here. Welcome to my story. Welcome to the planet earth. The end of the 6th day, creation’s done, everything’s made. Now he makes Adam and now he makes Eve. And he says, “Hey I just wanted you guys to be in the story. It’s my story. It’s my world. It’s my planet. It’s my universe. It’s all for me. From me through me to me, through me be the glory for ever and ever amen. And I just want to invite you in. “

2005-03-13T23:00:00.000-06:00

jen + paint + abstract art = friends.

the end

not good for me at all

2005-03-11T01:06:00.000-06:00

7684010176
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

but oh so yummy :)

2005-03-09T00:38:00.000-06:00

One of my students came into my office today (he is one third of a leaders bible study I "lead" each week) asking something I have never been asked before. We are wrapping up a series on prayer next week. He wants us to do a piece of abstract art together (note: none of us = artist, I can't draw stick people or color in the lines). Not just to do art, but as a response - to what we have been challeged by, or a scripture, or the like. Then we will take this one piece of largish art (yes it will be "art") and cut it into 3 pieces - one for each of us. It will be time to respond to the message and heart of God in a way that we rarely (or never do).

2005-03-07T02:27:00.000-06:00

Last song of my Sunday (and for the next 7 days)

Artist: MercyMe
Song: Word Of God Speak
I'm finding myself at a loss for words
And the funny thing is it's okay
The last thing I need is to be heard
But to hear what You would say

Word of God speak
Would You pour down like rain
Washing my eyes to see
Your majesty
To be still and know
That You're in this place
Please let me stay and rest
In Your holiness
Word of God speak

I'm finding myself in the midst of You
Beyond the music, beyond the noise
All that I need is to be with You
And in the quiet hear Your voice

Word of God speak
Would You pour down like rain
Washing my eyes to see
Your majesty
To be still and know
That You're in this place
Please let me stay and rest
In Your holiness
Word of God speak

Word of God speak
Would You pour down like rain
Washing my eyes to see
Your majesty
To be still and know
That You're in this place
Please let me stay and rest
In Your holiness
Word of God speak

I'm finding myself at a loss for words
And the funny thing is it's okay

Daniel 3:16-18 (NIV)

2005-03-07T00:25:00.000-06:00

16 Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to the king, "O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. 17 If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king. 18 But even if he does not, we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up."

Statements of faith like this are one of the reasons I am excited about this series. How much more challenging is this in college than when one is 3-5.

everyone

2005-03-07T00:19:00.000-06:00

everyone
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

fb-ot style

2005-03-07T00:18:00.001-06:00

fb-ot style
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

for the OT in all of us

good sam

2005-03-07T00:18:00.000-06:00

good sam
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

jesus

2005-03-07T00:17:00.001-06:00

jesus
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

Jesus2

2005-03-07T00:17:00.000-06:00

Jesus2
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

we know this is Jesus because of the way he is standing

heaven

2005-03-07T00:15:00.001-06:00

heaven
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

ever wonder what heaven looks like?

white people

2005-03-07T00:15:00.000-06:00

white people
Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

why is everyone white?

flannel-board extravaganza

2005-03-07T00:01:00.000-06:00

My office now has its very own flannel board. I know you're thinking you work with college students - what is up with the flannel board. I am in the midst of working on (among too many other things - retreat, study on the psalms, silence devo, etc) our women's bible study for next year. The theme? Beyond the Flannel Board. The fall we will look at stories from the OT and the spring the NT - looking deeper into the stories we've heard since childhood. As as inspiration and in preparation - I have a flannelboard and will even post pictures for your joy and memories....

2005-03-01T16:14:00.000-06:00

From our friends at angry aliens!

photo removed so my page is happy - you can still click here to see it

Phos Hilaron

2005-03-01T14:57:00.000-06:00

One of the earliest Christin hymns known.

Hail, gladdening Light, of his pure glory poured
Who is the immortal Father, heavenly, blest,
Holiest of Holies, Jesus Christ, our Lord.
Now we are come to the sun’s hour of rest,
The lights of evening round us shine,
We hymn the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit divine.
Worthiest art thou at all times to be sung
With undefiled tongue,
Son of our God, giver of life, alone!
Therefore in all the world thy glories, Lord, they own.

What do you say?

2005-02-28T00:51:00.000-06:00

The (assumed and arrested) BTK serial killer lived and killed a couple of hours from where I currently live. The ten murders started over 30 years ago. The community and families are feeling a sense of relief at the capture. One of my female students (who will live in that town for the summer) talked about how much safer she feels already. There are many questions that are surfacing, many emotions, relief, and confusion. Confusion abounds at the Christ Lutheran Church - where he was a member and leader (even holding an office). 'The pastor describes how one young Wichita church member saw
Rader's picture on the T-V news. He says the child turned to his father, saying "Dad, he tricked us, didn't he?" ' (KAKE - ABC affiliate and station which has received letters/contact from BTK in the past and recently). What message do you preach on a Sunday like this? Two days after police show up at the church and everything changes.

This is what their pastor (Michael Clark) spoke this morning, instead of his prepared Lenten message.

The events that have unfolded the past 48 hours have the power to destroy, to devastate us as a body of Christ or these events can bring us together and strengthen us as a faith community in a way that will never be the same.

These events have the power and energy to be a wedge that drives us apart, or they can be a force that will hold us together in these trying times.

"It makes no sense!" "What is it all about?" "What has just happened?" "I just don't understand?"

A sense of relief for some, a feeling of confusion for others! Where is the justice? Where is God? Why us, God? It can't be my son! It isn't my father! I just don't believe it! This is where many of us are in these troubled times. How can it be?

And there are many others who cry out "Finally!" It's over! What a relief! There is a god! Or: "Thank God!"

There is such a tension between what is going on and what is real. Our understandings are mixed. Our views are varied. Our minds are troubled. Our hearts are heavy. We turn to God in confusion.

We are in the midst of the Lenten season. We are in one of those dark valleys in our life journeys, both individually and as a body of Christ here at Christ Lutheran Church. We are in the midst of the Lenten season where we turn to the pain-filled, bled-on cross that held our lord and savior, Jesus Christ. We reflect on the pain and suffering our lord experienced and endured as he hung on a cross for each and every one of us.

I had my sermon for today prepared and comfortably tucked away for one final once over. Then on Friday afternoon of this past week a police officer came to the door of our church with papers in hand, and it changed everything. The name Dennis Rader was spoken softly but firmly. I was told Dennis had been arrested as a suspect in the BTK murders. I was told that many believed that Dennis Rader was very possibly the BTK murderer. I was told they had authority to search the church premises for evidence pertaining to this arrest.

The world changed that very moment. Nothing would ever be the same. Nothing would ever be able to restore life and its meaning back to what it was just a few short moments before that day. Whether the allegations were true or whether there was a misunderstanding, things had changed in a moment's notice. And yet, I can truly say, there was one thing that did not and had not changed that February day in 2005.

As I began to think about what was happening, what was unfolding before my very eyes I found myself listening to the final words of the Gospel of Matthew: "And remember, I am with you always, to the end of the age." (Matthew 28:20b)

"I will always be with you to the end of age."

Jesus has just given his disciples a very challenging task. He had presented each and every one of them with a task that had the potential of being life-threatening. Go and teach, to baptize and make disciples. That was quite a challenge, quite a demand especially in those times. Their leader had just been crucified on a cross. They, the disciples, were frightened! Who would protect them? Who would keep them safe from those who disliked them, those who objected to what they had to say? Jesus assures them no matter what happens he would walk with them, be with them to eternity.

Sometimes when we are in the valleys of life we cannot see the presence of God in our life. Sometimes the experiences are so dark that we cannot see through the muck and mire. And in those times we can lose hope. We lose sight of the light of Christ in our life and the darkness seems to overtake us. And yet, when we listen to the words of the Gospel writer John in the first chapter of John, we hear words of hope, of light, of assurance.

John 1:1, 3b-5: "In the beginning was the word, and the word was with God. He was in the beginning with God.... What has come into being in him was life, and life was the light of all the people. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did no overcome it."

Christ is the light for all people. Christ's light shines in the darkness, and darkness cannot over come the light. Christ will be with us through all the ages, in the dark times as well as in the light times.

We have been challenged this week. And we are not sure what to do with it.

One thing sure -- Christ is with us. The light of Christ continues to shine and lead us in the paths of darkness. As we continue forward to seek the truth that Christ wants us to know, we are to continue to pray for all concerned. We are to pray for peace and comfort for those victims and family members of the BTK murderer. We must lift them up and ask God for continued strength in the days ahead. We must pray for healing of heart and soul for those who have been victimized in this tragic series of murders.

We are to pray for all law enforcement people for the time and energy they have committed to the task of solving this problem.

As we continue on as a body of Christ, it is important that we show compassion and love towards Dennis. If what is claimed is true we should be about the business of asking for God's help in healing of heart and soul. As we travel from this day forward we should pray for all of Dennis Rader's family members. Bring them peace and comfort as they too wonder what each new day brings.

As a body of Christ we can let the power of these events that come before us either destroy us, to overcome us, or these events can bind us up to a stronger body, to a stronger community in Christ. We have that choice. I propose that we choose to let this be a time of strengthening, of renewing and healing. As we continue to let Christ's light shine in our world, let us become the stronger in faith, in love and in hope. "The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not overcome it."

Jesus tells us that if we continue in his Word we will know the truth and the truth will free us up, the truth will make us free. The truth from God will free us from the anger, the pain, the bitterness, the hardened heart, the release from being lost and confused.

As a body of Christ we are to continue to search for the truth that Christ brings us on the cross. As we look forward to the Lord's empty tomb and the hope of new life, may Christ's light continually shine in your darkness.

Amen.

the source for the theme for our spring retreat

2005-02-27T14:41:00.000-06:00

"The cross is not the terrible end to an otherwise godfearing and happy life, but it meets us at the beginning of our communion with Christ. When Christ calls a man, he bids him come and die. It may be a death like that of the first disciples who had to leave home and work to follow him, or it may be a death like Luther's, who had to leave the monastery and go out into the world. But it is the same death every time - death in Jesus Christ, the death of the old man at his call." Dietrich Bonhoffer The Cost of Discipleship

Mr. Picassohead

2005-02-26T14:45:00.000-06:00

Hours of fun! (well at least minutes)

....

2005-02-25T14:35:00.000-06:00

This is the second time to try and post it - it got eaten the first time.

Yesterday I told the powers that be here that I am going to look into another (very exciting but no further details for you yet) job opportunity at a university. These next few months should be an interesting journey for both Cats for Christ and myself. I am very excited about different parts of this spring semester.

The retreat coming up will be a great time of focus for our ministry and the others we have invited. We also have a devo in complete silence in a few weeks-ish (yes that is 75-90 minutes of silence with a group of college kids). I will post more on it after it happens. It should be a difficult but stretching time for our ministry.

The battle over Terri Schiavo continues. If that were my body and I was virtually gone, I would want to be removed from all artificial things that were keeping my organs running and blood pumping. I cannot imagine the difficultly of making this decision for either the husband or the parents. Both want what they seem as best for her, yet they are two very different things. And as a result they now are two opposing sides. It would be easy to say ______ is right the and the other is wrong. (Which was my initial reaction a few years ago when I first heard about this.) The need to scream "Can't they see the clear answer?" But once again that cheapens the process they have been through and what they believe in the best interest. They both have people that affirm and attack their positions. One doctor tells the husband that she is just a physical shell and another tells the parents that she can be treated. A tragedy has severed this family and is being played out in the media and the courts.

I wonder what our world would be like if we could see that people arrive at these differences of opinion and beliefs through genuine though, concern, and search for truth or what is right and not just something that would be easy to sign onto (granted I am sure that not everyone does this - I don't always do this). But what if we gave people the benefit of the doubt and came to the table of dialogue together rather than on the other side of the divide. What would our neighborhoods, communities look like? Our churches?

Abilene

2005-02-21T17:59:00.000-06:00

I am in Abilene for the ACU Lectureships and to connect with people from graduate school and before. Yesterday morning I was back at Highland sitting with my Colonial Kids during worship. Kids are great. They always tell it and show it as it is. They were full of hugs and clings. I miss those kiddos. It was good to be back and worship with the community of faith who has journeyed along side me for so long. My parents and I were able to go eat lunch afterwards (Abilene is a much shorter trek than Kansas.) before they had to head back. Today, in addition to the lectureships, I have been able to have many good conversations with friends, co-workers, and former classmates. More will follow in the next few days.

Now that email is checked and my Rosa's lunch is running thin, I am heading out for more of the same. There are a handful of restraunts/food types that are on my must eat list while I am here - Mexican and BBQ among them.

2005-02-19T07:54:00.000-06:00

The trek to abilene begins.

2005-02-18T20:07:00.000-06:00

My pirate name is:

Morty Jenny Rackham

You have the good fortune of having a good name, since Rackham (pronounced RACKem, not rack-ham) is one of the coolest sounding surnames for a pirate. Arr!

2005-02-17T02:26:00.000-06:00

Someone please explain something to me....

What does the SI swimsut issue have to do with sports? Today it came in the mail to the campus center (someone who lives there has an SI subscription). When I brought in the mail - they just told me to trash it (I was so proud.) But I kept it - something for us as the women of the minstry to talk about together (not the evils of the issue - but other issues that arise from things like this.) When I looked at it, I was shocked to see how far it had gone. There is no way that this should be sent to or able to be purchased by a young kid. (There they wre sitting by the cash register when I went to get coke at the gas station.) Yes I know they can find so much more on the internet. What value does it serve? Please don't even try and tell me its about the swimsuits (several models weren't wearing one at all). What message about women does this send to kids, teens, etc?

Here was the final kicker. (I could go on and on - but I will not.) The last page in the magazine has an ad with a picture (full page) with a family on it - dad, mom, kids and all - with some caption about doing something together. What? Talk about an absolute lack of fit.

Spiritual Application Number Next

2005-02-13T01:26:00.000-06:00

In the silence while driving, I have now been forced to hear a noise my truck makes sometimes when I make left turns. Before Friday, I'd never heard it before. But then again, I almost never drive with the radio/CDs off. It is not the kind of noise that could be heard over conversation or music of any kind. However, removing all of that, it has become inescapable. It demands that I take action (my wallet cringes). If I were to turn on the radio (fear not I won't ) I would be able to hear it again - for awhile - until I was distracted by other things.

Connect the spiritual application dots now on your own.
:)

From the mouth of Jack White

2005-02-10T22:59:00.000-06:00

Jack White (from the alternative band the White Stripes) on 60 minutes Wed. night --> "I'd got accepted to the seminary in Wisconsin and I was going to become a priest, but at the last second I thought, `I'll just go to public school,'"

Why you asked? What made him change his mind? What could this force be?

"I had just gotten a new amplifier in my bedroom and I didn't think I was allowed to take it with me."

Tis the Lenten Season

2005-02-10T22:05:00.000-06:00

In the past I have given up food stuffs during Lent (Anything that fell from a vending machine - there was a good reason, maybe I'll share it sometime; cokes, then last year - sugars broadly defined.) This year it is something of a different sort. Music. Music you say? Yes, the stereos are off, iTunes closed, anyone need to borrow a CD? Music is a filler for me - always on: in the truck, at the office, when I wake up, when I go to bed. So I am turning it off. Until Easter.

(Insert application about what we use as filler in our lives vs. what we should, and the value fo turning it off- here.)

On the way home I noticed how loud the turn singal noise really is.

snowman

2005-02-09T16:54:00.000-06:00

there is a snowman on my antenna, a snow angel in the bed, and my handles are packed with snow - i work with college students

blinking buttons

2005-02-08T18:32:00.000-06:00

Today as I was playing with my blog layout - I thought I'll add a banner to a stellar site (see blinking banner below). That sell fun shirts (hence the name). I won't leave it here forever, I just didnt want such a fine addition not to get primo attention. So for now it will "sponsor" every post.

Snowing

2005-02-08T16:13:00.000-06:00

It is snowing outside. It has been snowing outside since before 8 (by that time roads were already covered). It will continue to snow until at least nine tonight. Don't get me wrong, I like snow. Snow Skiing, Snowboarding, Snowpeople, Snow football, Snow ice cream. However I do not like wet snow + roads + not cleaned off yet + freezing temps. However it does look lovely outside.

Lectureships

2005-02-06T01:35:00.000-06:00

For my Abilene peeps,

I will be in town for lectureships - from the Saturday night before until early Wednesday.

the future

2005-02-06T01:26:00.000-06:00

When I was a kid, I didnt ever imagine life after 25. Who knows where that came from, but I remember the number. I have only told a few people this. However in just over 3 months I will be 26 (May 12, yes I have always been a Mother's Day kid). I am sitting in a place in my ministry where I have to make a decision if I will be here for the 2005-06 school year by the end of the month.

If I leave, I get to begin the job search all over again (thats always fun, but even more of an adventure if you are a single woman who has a passion for campus ministry, but not to be the admin assistant.) I have been asking what would college ministry look like if I wasn't working for a church. This has led me to places such as working in residence life (maybe a hall or area director) where I would work with tons of freshmen/soph as they are spreading their wings for the first time. What if I worked for a university in some capacity. what if......

And then I look across my desk and I see pictures of my Colonial kids who still have a firm grasp on my heart. What if....

And if I leave - how do I answer questions about why I am leaving?

And if I stay I get to begin the fundraising all over again. And some of the same questions from above are only pushed back a few months - because there is not a place for me here after that. There will not be a full time position here. And I am not a longterm match here - that has been made more clear recently.) Where do I find mentors and support in my ministry who can continue to guide, stretch, challenge me.

hummmmmm

A revised less ambitious experiment

2005-02-03T21:35:00.000-06:00

So I am not willing to spend the time it would take to get a MiniMac - but I am willing to try for either of the iPods. (If it works then our students can use the same method to get the mini macs for the campus center.) And more people are willing to try if they can work toward their own iPod (or iPod shuffle).

So in reality here is what I did. I signed up (using an email account that already gets a lot junk mail - if you need one I'll send you a gmail invite. However I have not received any junkmail from any of the sites). And I completed one of several available offers. (Some are free others "free trial" - it just depends when you click on them.) I did Blockbusters one month online rentals (3 at a time) for 9.99 for month one. (I will cancel it before the end of the month.) My DVD rentals shipped in less than 24 hours.

This site breaks down the offers and gives you a real look at what it takes

If you are thinking about it click on one of my links (rather than do it straight from the site - so at least someone gets credit - as do you for what ever you might see if you can get). Who knows if it gets close, I might help cover the cost of one moth with blockbuster.....

But no matter what I will enjoy this month hard to find DVDs (which are impossible to find in Manhattan, KS) and maybe just maybe have a new toy soon.

If you are motivated by a free ipod (takes 5 other people) click here www.freeipods.com

or the ipod shuffle (takes 3 other people) www.freeipodshuffle"

An Experiment....

2005-02-02T16:41:00.000-06:00

I've heard it works so I am trying it out. If it does work we will be using it to get new computers in our campus center. But I thought we'll see.
What is the worst that could happen?

www.FreeMiniMacs.com

So in reality here is what I did. I signed up (using an email account that already gets a lot junk mail - if you need one I'll send you a gmail invite). And I completed one of several available offers. (Some are free others "free trial" - it just depends when you click on them.) I did Blockbusters one month online rentals (3 at a time) for 9.99 for month one. (I will cancel it before the end of the month.)

This site breaks down the offers and gives you a real look at what it takes

If you are thinking about it click on one of my links (rather than do it straight from the site - so at least someone gets credit - as do you for what ever you might see if you can get). Who knows if it gets close, I might help cover the cost of one moth with blockbuster.....

So if you want to be in on this experiment feel free to click my referral link. www.FreeMiniMacs.com

I have had people I worked with that have gotten free ipods/laptops/video game systems through this so I figure why not try it.

But no matter what I will enjoy this month hard to find DVDs (which are impossible to find in Manhattan, KS) and maybe just maybe have a new toy soon.

If you are more motivated by a free ipod (takes 5 other people) click here www.freeipods.com

or the ipod shuffle (takes 3 other people) www.freeipodshuffle"

Dichotomy

2005-02-01T02:59:00.000-06:00

Tonight as I was working on our women’s bible study (on the Psalms) I had Iron Jawed Angels playing on my laptop next to me. If you have never heard of IJA, it is an HBO film about Alice Paul and Lucy Burns, and their work concerning women’s suffrage in the early 1900s. If you haven’t seen it, I can’t recommend it enough. Among the many things that ran through my mind and emotions one thought resounded the loudest, “I’ve never known. I’ve never heard these stories. I’ve never been grateful for the sacrifices of others for a right that I take for granted today.” Granted its an HBO movie that takes some liberties, but I realized I never questioned why or how these rights for women came to be. Powerful. Dealing with real issues. Willing to sacrifice everything for one cause.

Then when I got home (around 1:45am) and turn on my television, there is a half hour Girls Gone Wild infomercial. (In Manhattan, KS my antenna in the basement only picks up a small handful of channels from the towns around here – so slipping through all the channels doesn’t take much.) For a shirt or a smile, these girls (often inebriated) will flash the camera, remove what little clothes they were wearing to begin with, and dance around – then for a mere $9.99 a new DVD can be delivered to your house once a month.

My mind is exhausted – but I am not sure that it would know what to do with those two very different scenes even if it was fully rested.

2005-01-29T23:48:00.000-06:00

Its 11:48. Not long ago the MSNBC site had a breaking news banner at the top of their page: Blast Reported at Polling Site.